.15 "i am large, i contain multitudes."

a small housekeeping note:

as i’ve been thinking about how i want to care for my creative life, i’ve decided to move maybe we’re infinite to substack. this will allow me to offer free and paid writing in a way that feels more accessible and sustainable for me right now.

free monthly essays will continue here on beehiiv through february. starting in march, all new writing will live on substack. readers won’t be automatically moved over, so if you’d like to keep reading, you’ll need to subscribe there directly. at that point, folks will also be able to opt into the $5/month paid tier for the bonus mid-month essay, if they’d like.

in the meantime, you’re warmly invited to follow me over on substack, here, if this space has been meaningful to you.

thank you for being here — i’m very glad you are.

in my own gentle process of becoming, i’ve come to realize that, often, my biggest hindrance is feeling aimless. 

learning to accept that my path as a (recently-diagnosed) ADHD-er will likely always be a meandering one is an ongoing process. but it helps to have an idea of what it is i’m moving towards. i don’t necessarily need milestones. if i do set them, they’re usually flexible. but, ultimately, what is it that i want? what are my metrics for success? for joy?

creating a life purpose statement has helped me ground myself in my priorities. i have, historically, beat myself up about the number of hours i spend a week working jobs that feel out of alignment with who i am, or who i want to be. but i just kept job-hopping, not really knowing what i was looking for. in developing my statement, i finally accepted that the 40ish hours i spend at work every week are actually just a means for how i get to the things that i actually want. 

having this statement allows me to dream up the life i want and ensure that it’s aligned to my strengths and to my values. it allows me to take every new idea and and consider how much energy i want to put into it, depending on how aligned it is to my purpose (that includes my day job).

and maybe there are projects i want to take on that aren’t in alignment! that’s fine! but i can be intentional about making that choice, and put less pressure on myself — and just the right amount of energy — because i know that it’s just an experiment. something fun.

in that way, having this statement creates more room for play.

creating a life purpose statement

here are the initial questions i asked myself:

✨ core values

• what are the non-negotiable elements that define what matters most to me?

✨ strengths and passions

• what am i naturally good at? what excites or energizes me?

• how do i uniquely contribute to the world?

✨ impact

• what kind of difference do i want to make in the world, community, or in others' lives?

• what’s my "why" — the thing that drives my actions and aspirations?

✨ guiding principles

• what are the principles that will help me evaluate whether a choice aligns with my purpose?

✨ balance

• how do i ensure the statement resonates with both personal fulfillment and the way i interact with the world?

✨ flexibility

• how can i allow for some adaptability so the statement can evolve as i do?

my answers to these questions were molded into various drafts. with every iteration, i noticed what was missing or what felt out of alignment, and so i continued making changes until it felt “right enough” to put out into the world.

note, that does not mean perfect, because, as item number six states, my statement is flexible and can grow as i do. but i got it close enough to naming what felt right within me. a minimum viable product for what i want out of life, if you will.

the framework i ended up with was:

my purpose is…
i am guided by…
i find fulfillment in…
i move through life…
through my actions and choices, i aim to…

in all i do, i ask…

here’s the statement as it currently lives and breathes:

having this statement has been a meaningful first step in intentionally building my life, rather than letting life happen to me. and that, in turn, has been a necessary step in beginning to unmask the parts of me that have been hidden under fear and self-doubt for decades. when i say i am “becoming,” i always mean, not that i am becoming something else, but that i am becoming more myself. 

every step imbued with purpose helps guide me deeper into the infinite universe that i am inside. my life is valuable simply because it is, but i become both stronger and softer when i do the self work of gaining clarity. 

i become more myself when i embrace that learning is never-ending — when i continue to seek, to understand, to grow.

i hope that, in this season of rest and reflection, taking the time to sit with some of these questions helps bring you back to yourself. that it helps expand your sense of possibility, so that you enter the new year with renewed hope and purpose.

wishing you a soft new year. ✨

<3,

n.